I was completely inspired by the article I read recently: In the absence of ‘the village,’ mothers struggle most; by Beth Berry.
We must do this together, we must rebuild the village our hearts so desperately need.
Here are a few tangible steps you can take whenever you’re ready:
1. Get really clear on one thing.
The fact that you’re struggling is not a reflection of your inadequacies, but the unnatural cultural circumstances you’re living within.
2. Own + honor your needs.
Most mothers are walking around with several deeply unmet needs of their own while focusing almost exclusively on the needs of others. This is precisely the thing that keeps us from gaining traction and improving our circumstances, both individually and collectively.
3. Practice vulnerability.
Rich, safe, authentic connection is essential for thriving. Cultivating this quality of connection takes courage and a willingness to step outside your comfort zone. What you want most exists on the other side of that initial awkward conversation or embarrassing introduction.
4. Own your strengths.
What makes you feel strong and fully alive? What lights you up and gives you energy just thinking about it? Who would you be to your village if you had one? Tapping into your strengths and engaging them is one of the greatest ways to attract the kinds of people you want into your life, bless and inspire others, and build a sense of community in ways that fill rather than drain you.
5. Become an integral part of something.
Whether it’s a knitting group, dance troupe, church, kayaking club or homeschool collective, commit to growing community around one area of your life that enlivens you or fills a need. Use the connections you cultivate within this community to practice showing up bravely and authentically and asking for what you need, whether that’s support, resources or encouragement.
6. Do your part + ONLY your part.
Though it’s tempting to fill our lives to the brim with commitments that make a difference, doing so only further disempowers us. Read Essentialism by Greg McKeown if you struggle with this one.
7. Learn self-love + self-compassion.
In a culture of “never enough” it is essential that we forge healthy relationships with ourselves in order to be able to fend off the many messages hitting us about who we’re meant to be and what makes us worthy of happiness and love. In fact, I see self-love in action as the greatest gift our generation of mothers could possibly give to the mothers of tomorrow.
8. Speak your truth.
Even when you’re terrified. Even if it makes you the bravest one in the room.
9. Imagine a new way.
Where we’re headed looks nothing like where we’ve come from. Creating the kind of future we want requires envisioning that future and believing a new way to be possible. Get specific and think big. What do you want?
Hi, I'm Teresa. I am a Certified Integrative Health Coach who focuses on autoimmune diseases and building your immune system.